Attorney Marilyn Gale Vilyus Offers Guidance On Divorce

Attorney Marilyn Gale Vilyus Offers Guidance On Divorce

No one except an individual can determine whether or not a divorce is right for him or her. However, there are some general questions which pretty much apply to everybody. Thinking about the following issues may help them evaluate whether a divorce is right for themselves.
What specifically is making someone think of divorce?
Physical Abuse
When a spouse is violent to someone and/or their kids, this is a safety issue. No matter what someone may have done, noone deserves to be physically hurt. Spouses may try to justify their actions by casting blame for all marital problems. A marriage requires effort by both persons to make it work.
Ask the following questions:
a. Has your spouse tried to isolate you from your friends and family?
b. Have you had to call the police to stop violence?
c. Have you ever had to go to the hospital as a result of being hurt by your spouse?
d. Does your spouse apologize after hurting you and promise “never to do it again?”
e. Do you try to do everything “right” to keep your spouse from losing his or her temper?
f. Does this work for a little while, only to have the violence eventually start again?
g. Can you feel the pressure building in between violent episodes?
h. Does the smallest thing set off a violent episode?
i. Do you feel that nothing you do is right?
If someone can identify with the above questions, he or she may be a victim of “battered spouse syndrome.” This situation, although it can occur with both wives and husbands, usually describes a situation in which a husband is physically abusing his wife.
A great deal of psychological and legal study has been done on this topic. Often, women who have been abused “forgive their husbands” and stay in the abusive situation. It has been found that five times is the average number of times a woman leaves her spouse before she can successfully escape the psychological control an abusive spouse can have over her.
Often, an abused wife alienates her family and friends who get angry when they try to help the woman leave, only to learn that she has returned to her husband and the dangerous situation.
Many think they don’t have anywhere to go. Most cities have special shelters for woman and children and will keep a location secret from husbands. Free legal fees are also frequently available.
Help is definitely available. Don’t stay or permit children to stay in a situation which could result in serious injury or even death.
Those who think they may be the abuser in this situation may also find help to stop the pattern of behavior to move forward and enjoy the pleasure of a healthy, happy relationship.
Everyone deserves a second chance at happiness. Everybody can change and learn and grow from our mistakes. Maybe counseling is the answer. Maybe an anger management class would help; or, spiritual guidance from a member of the clergy. Perhaps yoga, meditation or some other form of “alternative” medicine. Reach out and find the help that is available.
The Affair
Most believe that never in a million years could it happen to them. All of sudden, a spouse stays up late or gets up in the middle of the night to use the computer. Chat rooms, e-mails, internet “buddies.” How did that picture get distributed on the internet? (You know, the one you took thinking that it would remain private between you and your spouse. )
Then, there are the old-fashioned, more traditional ways to cheat: the business trip, the co-worker, or the high school reunion hook-up. Let’s not forget the world’s oldest profession.
The question is – does someone leave or stay?
The world is divided into two groups of people – spouses who can forgive an affair by their spouse and move forward – and those who can’t.
Those who fall victim to a wandering spouse should be honest and think about whether they want the marriage to continue. Is there a sincere desire to work things out, or is someone secretly determined to make their spouse’s life a living hell? Maybe they don’t really want this consciously; perhaps they just can’t help themselves.
Maybe personal or spiritual values will keep them from continuing in a marriage in which a spouse has cheated. Or, the opposite could be true – those who feel they are committed to stay in a marriage no matter what.
Being honest about true motives will go a long way towards helping make the right decision.
It’s also possible that the marriage has been over for a long time. What would have to happen to save a relationship – talk about what seems to be missing in the marriage? Do the spouses still love each other?
Or, is it just a day late and a dollar short?
Sometimes, a couple has passed the point of no return. Regardless of whether a spouse wants a divorce or not, the State of Texas will not force a couple to live together if one of them wants a divorce. Most of the time, one person leaves the relationship long before the other. A spouse may need some “catch-up” time to get used to this idea.
If this is the case, be prepared for a bumpy ride for awhile. A spouse will probably alternate between being angry, depressed, bargaining, penitent, furious, grieving, victimized, vengeful, retaliatory, depressed again, pathetic, and hostile (and then all over again).
It’s possible spouses may not know which of the other spouse’s “multiple personalities” they are going to have to deal with on any given day. One minute, everything is calm and both are talking rationally. The next day, they’re living in the seventh circle of hell.
It helps to remember that some of this is purely situational; ie. it is (believe it or not) normal behavior. It isn’t actually about the two individuals – one and a spouse. Instead, it’s about being hurt and feeling betrayed. Both parties feel guilty. Both are suffering. Both feel just plain miserable.
Debt
Those purchases seemed like a good idea at the time. All of a sudden, credit card debt and lots of it (thousands and thousands of dollars worth) moves the question to whether to declare bankruptcy and then get divorced or vice versa.
Some may not want or intend to declare bankruptcy at all. If this is a consideration though, contact a bankruptcy attorney to best consider the options that make the most sense for a personal situation.
Other kinds of financial problems frequently stress a marriage and can bring it to an early conclusion: gambling, excessive drinking, drug use (the costs involved here), spending on step-children or adult children.
Got problems with child support from a previous relationship? (Interest and penalties can cause the most loving spouse to lose his or her sense of humor. )
Money can’t buy happiness. It has been suggested that the people who believe that don’t know where to shop.
Food and shelter are pretty basic needs (Maslow’s Hierarchy – Psychology 101). A spouse who thinks his or her partner is to blame for their financial ruin may just decide to cut their losses and run (very fast).
Debt counseling and debt consolidation could help. Getting out from under steep monthly payments may provide much needed relief, as can re-financing the house or a home equity loan. These solutions will only work if the couple cures the disease and not just the symptoms. A serious change in lifestyle is in order.
Can a couple work this through? Can they afford to split up? Two people can live together cheaper than they can apart – sometimes, a couple literally cannot make it financially living separately.
Conclusion
Those who review these questions may not be any closer to knowing whether or not filing for divorce is the right answer, but may find it helpful when thinking about some of the above in the decision making process.

All About Single Parents

All About Single Parents

The six branches of yoga
Source: Flickr


The Wikipedia Web site defines single parents are parents without partners in raising a child or children.
A single parent, accordingly is one parent who is not living with the child’s or children’s other significant parent,

Definitions and descriptions of single parents vary and differ from one society or country to another society or nation. Different cultures also foster different treatment and classification for single parents.

In one country, however, single parents are treated differently according to geographic locations. For example, single parents in the industrial and commercial cities are treated differently and are provided with different perks as compared to those single parents who are based in provinces or the rural areas.

Single parenthood is becoming a very popular style of living nowadays. However, not all societies are readily prepared to accept and treat the trend or concept as a rising trend or norm.

The technical definition of single parents

Single parents are either left alone or abandoned by the other significant parent or their partners. The abandonment involved may come in different occasions and forms.

Single parents are usually abandoned by their respective partners after divorce, after separation (both legal and in principle), after the other parent is jailed, after practical abandonment or after the other parent dies.

Single parents, in more rare cases, do not really have to be the child or children’s biological parents. Yes, blood and DNS affinity may not be the only basis on parenthood.

This also applies to single parents. Single parenthood really is a choice, especially if the child is not really biologically from the single moo or single dad. What a noble situation if that happens!

Single parents, according to recent studies, also become such through different means. Single parents have or attain their children by legal or in-principle adoption or by bearing the child through artificial insemination or surrogate parenting.

Single parenthood, therefore, is a choice. Single parents practically choose to be such. You know how hard it is to raise children nowadays. Financially, physically, emotionally and mentally, single parenthood can really be draining.

In other countries, especially those characterized by strict and old-fashioned norms or cultures, single parents are still considered outcasts. That is because during those rare cases, single parents are treated like they have done unforgivable mistakes or misgivings.

The rising trend of single parents

A recent commissioned study or research in the United States alone reveals that about three children in every ten children on a nationwide average live in homes run by single parents.

The most common and prevalent type of single parents are those situations where there is the single mom. It should also be noted, however, that the other type of single parenthood, those with the father acting as both the mom and the dad of the child is also rapidly increasing.

The father as the single parent is the common single parenthood setting in the Islamic countries. That is because the governments of these nations still do not recognize the value and the ability of women, particularly moms to raise children or even carry on such great responsibilities.

The 2002 Census report in the United States show that there were only 15% of custodial parenthoods, whose single parent carrying on the responsibility of raising the child is the father. For comparison, that figure has risen by 10% over the past ten years.

It means, in the 1990s, it was very rare that single dads carry on the responsibility of solely raising the child. Tides have turned since then, apparently. Single dads are now becoming a popular notion, concept or situation in the modern society.

Single parenthood

Indeed, you must not be too judgmental against single parents, especially in these times. It is because the trend and concept of single parenthood is becoming not uncommon to almost all societies around the world.

Gone were the days when children raised by single parents were called bastards and were teased ceaselessly in school. The legislative sector now has instituted laws to protect children of single parents.

Single parenthood is becoming too popular and common that it is now an accepted situation and occurrence. Commend and congratulate single parents. The choice they have made for their lives are truly courageous.

Challenges Of Single Parenting Today

Challenges Of Single Parenting Today

One of the hardest issues to survive in, as a single parent, is an overwhelming emotion that you should complete the role of both mother and father. This feeling evolves and will be more intense if the other single parent is not portraying a role that is active with the children.

You would probably fight this feeling often in two ways. Either you try to compensate by being both the mom or dad or you get on one of those wild life hunting explorations to search for a partner to fill in the other role. May I tell you a piece of advice? Neither one of these options will work. It is easier to say it than to do it.

Single parents always bring this feeling of guilt for the reason that their children do not obtain the love and care they could be getting from another parent. So what are you supposed to do? It is a very difficult situation.

For example, you are a single father with three children. This gets even more complicated if two out of the three are girls and you will have to choose between being a mom or to hunt for the mom to be able to have a better orientation for your daughters.

You would most probably go on an exploration to fill the second. Not a year has passed and you would probably go back to being a single parent.

As mentioned, this is never the answer. The lesson on that example is that you cannot replace the mom or the dad. Of course, this does not mean that it is impossible to find people who are ready to be a huge portion of both yours and your children’s life. What is really meant is that this should not be the reason of the relationship you from.

Instead of feeling that you need to replace your wife or your husband for your kids, why don’t you focus on what you need to provide or give to them? Being a single parent is not a reason for you to feel guilty. You should rather be proud that your sons and daughters have you.

This article is written to help you, single parents, realize that your children love you and if you are going to find another spouse or feel guilty, you are not going anywhere. Yo have to comprehend that single parents do not have to have a mate to make your kids glad.

If you are a single parent, then you are probably strongly thinking that you should fill both roles. This is empowered by the feeling of guilt for fitting our children in difficult positions. You have to get over this and recover as fast as you could.

You are only human; you are not a super hero. You cannot do everything by yourself and you should never feel that you are second best just because of this.

Your children do not all the time give a helping hand either. Children are not evil, crazy or anything of that kind, they are just being what they are, kids. It is what kids always do, and it turns out that it really works well for them. You need to adapt to working with your kids with your own provisions and not feel lower than appropriate for the reason that you cannot do something.

In total, you gain the respect of your kids if you follow what this article just said. No matter how much and how well you try, you surely cannot be both your children’s mom and dad. So take this as an advice, quit trying.

You do not need to be fit and lean to make your kids love and appreciate you. They love you just the way you are. You should even appreciate yourself first in order to make your children and others appreciate you. You should know that parenting exercise is different.

You are most probably thinking that being a single parent drains your energy and will not let you have time for yourself. Well, tell you what, it does not. It helps you become stronger and it makes you appreciate yourself because of what you do.

Challenges Of Single Parenting

Challenges Of Single Parenting

Challenges Of Single Parenting

One of the hardest issues to survive in, as a single parent, is an overwhelming emotion that you should complete the role of both mother and father. This feeling evolves and will be more intense if the other single parent is not portraying a role that is active with the children.

You would probably fight this feeling often in two ways. Either you try to compensate by being both the mom or dad or you get on one of those wild life hunting explorations to search for a partner to fill in the other role. May I tell you a piece of advice? Neither one of these options will work. It is easier to say it than to do it.

Single parents always bring this feeling of guilt for the reason that their children do not obtain the love and care they could be getting from another parent. So what are you supposed to do? It is a very difficult situation.

For example, you are a single father with three children. This gets even more complicated if two out of the three are girls and you will have to choose between being a mom or to hunt for the mom to be able to have a better orientation for your daughters.

You would most probably go on an exploration to fill the second. Not a year has passed and you would probably go back to being a single parent.

As mentioned, this is never the answer. The lesson on that example is that you cannot replace the mom or the dad. Of course, this does not mean that it is impossible to find people who are ready to be a huge portion of both yours and your children’s life. What is really meant is that this should not be the reason of the relationship you from.

Instead of feeling that you need to replace your wife or your husband for your kids, why don’t you focus on what you need to provide or give to them? Being a single parent is not a reason for you to feel guilty. You should rather be proud that your sons and daughters have you.

This article is written to help you, single parents, realize that your children love you and if you are going to find another spouse or feel guilty, you are not going anywhere. Yo have to comprehend that single parents do not have to have a mate to make your kids glad.

If you are a single parent, then you are probably strongly thinking that you should fill both roles. This is empowered by the feeling of guilt for fitting our children in difficult positions. You have to get over this and recover as fast as you could.

You are only human; you are not a super hero. You cannot do everything by yourself and you should never feel that you are second best just because of this.

Your children do not all the time give a helping hand either. Children are not evil, crazy or anything of that kind, they are just being what they are, kids. It is what kids always do, and it turns out that it really works well for them. You need to adapt to working with your kids with your own provisions and not feel lower than appropriate for the reason that you cannot do something.

In total, you gain the respect of your kids if you follow what this article just said. No matter how much and how well you try, you surely cannot be both your children’s mom and dad. So take this as an advice, quit trying.

You do not need to be fit and lean to make your kids love and appreciate you. They love you just the way you are. You should even appreciate yourself first in order to make your children and others appreciate you. You should know that parenting exercise is different.

Hmmm… You are most probably thinking that being a single parent drains your energy and will not let you have time for yourself. Well, tell you what, it does not. It helps you become stronger and it makes you appreciate yourself because of what you do.

Single Parents Dating: It Is Time To Move On

Single Parents Dating: It Is Time To Move On

Grab my waist, and kiss my lips
Source: Flickr

Being a single parent is not the end of the world. It doesn’t mean that you will shut all doors closed from dating someone else. Single parents also need to go out on a date for them to relax and unwind from their heavy role as a mother and father. Single parents dating or going out is healthy.

Single parent dating friends.

If you think you are not ready to enter into a new relationship, dating old time friends is an option for you. You can say to your friends things that you cannot say to your family or relatives. Friends can also advise you if you are spoiling your child. Friends can also be a good help whenever you need help in your work and at home.

Single parents dating prospects.

But if you think that you are ready for another serious relationship, you can do so but better be careful the next time around. Single parents dating again should be more careful and cautious for the sake of their child and their self.

Single parents who wish to go out on a date may do so with help from a friend. Better assess yourself first if you have the time to accommodate a date with your humongous tasks at hand. Don’t say yes if you haven’t set your schedule yet. Remember that you are not only a mother but also the father of your child. You need to plan ahead of a week if you are really eager to find a date.

Single parents dating again feel the thrill and fear of trying to find love again. But you need to know more about the person. Finding love needs time. To avoid committing mistakes again, evaluate your date’s character. You need to make sure that your chosen partner can also provide nurturing and love to your child. Yes, maybe he loves you but did he love your child too?

Prospects of single parents dating.

Single parents should assess their self. They should know what kind of relationship they want. They should also talk to their child or children if they want to have a new dad or mom. Listen to your child if they are ready to have an addition to your family.

What to do when on a date?

To ensure that you will have a fun and safe date, make someone know where are you going and who is your date. Let someone know what time they will expect you home. Don’t forget to bring along your mobile phone in case of emergency and for easy access to you.

Single parents dating should avoid watching movies because you are still in getting-to-know you stage. Watching movies needs silence while munching your popcorn and sipping your soda. You cannot know the guy this way. His family background, his likes and dislikes, his plans and ambitions, you wouldn’t know if you are only watching movies. It is better to date in public places if you are dating for the first time.

When is the appropriate time for single parents to go out on a date?

Single parents dating for the second time find it hard to tell their children especially if they are a widow or a divorcee. They need to consider the feelings of their children. They need to ensure that their children can cope up with this new environment.

Single parents always make a mistake by entering in a relationship so soon after the death of the husband or a divorce because they feel alone and need someone who can bring back their smile again. Coping from a lost loved one is a long healing process. It is advised that widow should take two years approximately to enter into a new relationship. For a divorced man or woman, it is advised to entertain a suitor at least six months to one year or until all legal matters including estate, property, insurance matters has been settled from past relationship.

When single parents jump into a serious dating, they should be cautious with their actions to lessen the risk of conflict with their children. Remember that you are not the only one who had suffered loss from the past but also your children. Just make sure before entering into a date, you are ready to handle difficult situation like introducing you new partner to your children and what will you do if your children resent your new partner.

Tips for Dating a Woman with Kids

Tips for Dating a Woman with Kids

Inspirational quotes have an amazing ability to motivate others and change the way we feel about ourselves. This is why I find them so interesting and crucial on our paths to success. Come see what we’re about at http://makemoneyonline-programs.com/?id=41
Source: Flickr

Dating a woman with kids poses its own challenges. In most relationships, the chemistry is between a man and a woman. When you are dating a woman with kids, the relationship becomes between a man, woman, and child.

First of all, you should know that it is harder for single moms to find dates than it is for women without children. Many men shy away from single moms because they don’t want to deal with the challenges of children. This means that a single mom may be more approachable and eager to date you. That doesn’t mean that she’ll have lots of time for you though. Dating a woman with kids means that you compete for her time, and her kids will always come first.

A single mom will probably be working full time, going to little league practice or ballet lessons, and having a social life besides. Where she fits you into the picture may be limited. For instance, she may want to see you for dinner on Wednesday nights only – because that’s dad’s night with the kids. She may only be available for dates every other Saturday.

You will have to decide together when to get to know her kids. It is bad parenting to bring a succession of men into her kids’ lives. So, despite the fact that her kids are the most important thing in the world to her, you may find yourself being excluded from this realm for six months or more. When you do meet the kids, you have to decide how you will relate to them. They’re not your children, but you will want them on your side. While younger children are easier to impress – just toss a ball or draw with them – older kids have their own activities.

Most children wish that their mom and dad would get back together. They are likely to see you as a threat to this fantasy. In almost all cases, there is at least initial resistance to having you in their mom’s life. You will also have the challenges of authority when you are dating a woman with kids. When you give an instruction to a child, they are likely to say “you’re not my dad.” Think through your response to this challenge carefully ahead of time as it may set the tone for the rest of your relationship with the child.

Another problem with dating a woman with children is that it can get quite expensive. After you have settled into a relationship and you know her kids, dates often become “family” outings. Instead of going for pizza and beer with your girlfriend, you are likely to end up at Chuck E. Cheese’s with the kids in tow. Forget going to an amusement park unless the kids get to come along.

And, sex becomes tricky when you are dating a woman with kids. Some women are reluctant to bring you home for an overnight because of the message that will send to the kids. She is also not likely to want to come over to your place because that involves finding someone to watch the kids.

If she does allow you into her bedroom, you may well be interrupted by children at a key moment. Be prepared for children to invade every aspect of your life. One final note – if you do get involved with a woman’s children and subsequently break up with her, you will almost always lose your relationship with the kids. In this case, you will suffer from double heartbreak. This is not to say that you should avoid dating a woman with kids. Instead, be aware of the challenges – and the possibilities.

Advice From A Divorce Attorney?

Advice From A Divorce Attorney?

I believe that divorce is one of the biggest epidemics in our current society that isn’t being recognized or treated as such. As a marriage and family therapist, of course divorce is something that I am passionate about because it is something that I am spending my life to fight against. I am not ignorant enough to believe that I will see all cases of divorce end during my lifetime, nor am I ignorant enough to believe that all divorce cases even should be prevented. I am, however, perhaps ignorant in my belief that it is crazy for people considering divorce to get advice from a divorce attorney.

Now, most of you are thinking I’m crazy. Who would go to a divorce attorney for advice about their failing marraige? Many people, unfortunately. I had no idea until I began working with marriages and families in crisis just how many individuals and even couples were seeking refuge and advice with their divorce attorney.

I was overwhelmed by my new knowledge for one primary reason. Have people considering getting a divorce forgotten that a divorce attorney is the very last person who will be concerned with them repairing a broken marriage? A divorce attorney makes a living helping married people get divorced while getting as many benefits from the divorce as possible. So why would any nearly-divorced person go to a divorce attorney in hopes of fixing their marraige? Beats me.

My advice to anyone struggling in their marriage is to make an appointment to visit a professional counselor or a marriage and family therapist. The core reason why I suggest this is because in general, counselors and therapists are people who deeply want to see marriages and families restored rather than torn apart. If I am looking for someone to help me fix my car, then it is far wiser to get help from an individual who actually believes that cars can be fixed, right? Of course. The same is true with marriage. Do not go for help to someone who believes that marriages should end easily and for any reason at all. Go instead to a professional who is trained in giving you wisdom about ways to make your relationship work.

A divorce attorney is great for people who are sure that divorce is the option they are choosing. If, however, you are still unsure of your options and if you are still hoping for healing in your marriage, then a divorce attorney is the last person you should see.

Family Meetings (2)

Family Meetings

Painful problems occur in every family. In fact, pain is a challenge for everyone. The Family Meeting is an excellent tool for discussing difficult situations.
Many of our children face the one thing that pains them most, divorce. In my 22 years as a child/family counselor, I rarely found a child happy about his/her parents’ divorce. Instead they looked for ways to get their parents to pull together. They thought if they became the focus of their parents’ attention, their parents might stay together. Some kids exploded with anger. Some moped with depression. Others “dropped out.” Their tactics didn’t work.
Family Meetings can help parents either separately or together help their children cope. Below are 5 painful problems that most children of divorce never want to face.
5 Painful Problems:
1. Learning that their parents are divorcing.
2. Moving to a different neighborhood and school.
3. Window watching for the visiting parent who doesn’t come.
4. Meeting their parents’ new lover.
5. Meeting the kids in the “other” family.
Divorce creates a hole in the hearts of our kids. Rather than let that hole broaden and deepen, Family Meetings can help our children voice their feelings.
At Family Meetings parents find out their children’s shocking thoughts and feelings,like:
• “The divorce is my fault.”
• “If I had been a better kid, mom and dad wouldn’t be divorcing.”
• “If I hadn’t said the wrong things, maybe mom and dad would still be together.
Finding out how our kids think and feel is the first step to helping them. Listening and letting them voice their pain can release some of the stress they are carrying. The Family Meeting is a good place to share their pain.
Whether you’re a single parent, a stepparent, an adoptive family, a foster parent, or a two parent family, the Family Meeting offers a powerful approach to easing pain and helping our children cope. That’s why I wrote Character Building with the Family Meeting Diary. Why not use it to discuss the painful problems in your family? You’ll be glad you did.

Articles On Single Parenting

Articles On Single Parenting

Articles On Single Parenting Becoming Popular in Modern Days

There are many articles concerning about single parenting. Single parents need not worry on how to handle your situation as a single parent to your children.

You may search for articles like this one through various website and even in local magazines. For more brief and precise articles about single parenting, you may also visit the libraries and bookstores. Reading and understanding the articles for single parenting may give you tips and guides in handling your day-to-day relationship with your children.

Because of the growing number of people who are becoming single parents caused by break-up of marriage, teenage pregnancies, divorce and death of other partner, the publication of articles on single parenting have also increases. There is a growing demand for self-help tips in raising a child or children by a single parent.

There are articles on single parenting that focuses on a single mom or dad who lose a husband or a wife because of death. These articles help a widow or widower handle grief and how to continue their life without a partner in life.

There are also articles on single parenting that teach about proper caring of infants, toddlers and kids who are in school already. These articles cover the basic management of kids’ tantrums and their attitudes towards you as a parent and to other people. Single parents, especially teenage single mother, will also gain knowledge from these articles on single parenting such as basic childcare, bathing an infant, first aid techniques..

A woman who is expecting her first baby without a partner to help her in child rearing may also benefit from the contents of these articles on single parenting. These articles will show her to take care of her body during and after pregnancy.

It is also good for every single parent to start reading articles on single parenting and child psychology so that she could raise her child morally upright. When their child grows and starts asking questions, they must know how to answer these questions, most especially the sensitive ones. Do not take for granted the questioning of your child because you would not know the effect in the event that you ignore them.

Children who are raised in a wrecked home or are the product of a teenage pregnancy are said to be more sensitive than children who are raised in a normal home because they feel that they are the usual topic in school and in their community. You must help to cope up by searching on the articles on single parenting that will solve the problem of your child. You must obtain a regular communication with your child so that you can also monitor his companions, his favorite things to do and problems he is encountering outside your home.

There are articles on single parenting that you must disregard especially those that only confuse. Remember that articles on single parenting are written by humans only, and human are not perfect. Many authors of articles on single parenting use their opinions as their basis of writing their articles. Sometimes it is not informative.

To avoid waste of your money examine first the articles on single parenting before you purchase. Articles on single parenting must be informative, specific and goal oriented. Articles on single parenting should be informative in a way that you can gain learning, knowledge, methods, and ideas that can help you in your way of raising your child and becoming you as a better person.

Articles on single parenting must contain specific and more precise information for easy understanding. Most single parents are commonly on the lower income earner and sometimes force to stop their education to support their child. Single parents need to feed useful articles regarding single parenting that is understandable to apply the knowledge as possible.

Authors of articles on single parenting are advised to feature articles that are more on a goal-oriented topic. Every single parent goal is to secure better future for the children.

Authors may write an article on single parenting that is more inspirational in achieving their goal. They may also discuss topics that will establish their morals and strengthens their faith and give them strong determination in achieving success.

For those single parents who are cutting their cost on buying things to save for the most essential needs, they may visit public libraries near their place. They may borrow articles on single parenting that is functional for them. Single parents must not stop on learning for they will be their child’s first teacher.

Single parents must show their child that they are interested in learning to make them a role model and children will also become interested in studying and reading materials. Children of young age are very willing to attend school and learn their alphabet.

Children must gain support from the parents in also achieving the goal of their child. Education is one of the rights of the child. Do not disappoint your child. It is better to enhance the talents and abilities of children than make them useful and productive.

Articles on single parenting are great help for single parents in guiding the path of every child and make them leaders of your community.

Dating Tips for Divorced and Widowed Moms

Dating Tips for Divorced and Widowed Moms

Dating is tough, but it’s tougher for women who are divorced and widowed. Along with the fears of being “out of practice,” there are often children’s feelings to consider.
How can a single mother enjoy a new romance without lying awake at night worrying about doing emotional damage to her children? Personal Strengths and Life Coach Sue Tosto of Garfield, New Jersey provides the answers.
1. How soon after divorce or the death of a husband is it appropriate to start dating?
It depends on the individual, but anyone going through a divorce should wait at least six months to one year before even considering dating someone new. Emotions are running high, and a person needs time to heal before putting herself back on the market. Some newly divorced or widowed people jump into relationships too early because they’re afraid of being alone. That’s almost always a mistake.
The first year after a divorce is the time to re-group and focus on making new friendships. A woman can reflect on all the things she wanted to do when she was married but didn’t. This is a rough time emotionally, but it helps to view it as a fresh start. It’s the perfect time to re-develop a sense of self and decide what one really wants in life. A woman can consider what she hopes for in a new relationship and let go of the past in the process.
Dating after the death of a husband or partner is also not recommended for at least one full year. Two years is even better. The grieving process should never be rushed, and the length of time it takes for the bereaved to move on varies according to the individual.
Other matters to consider before dating include waiting until estate matters have been handled, i.e., insurance matters, review of the will, and the assignment of an executor or executrix if necessary. The stress a new relationship can cause during this emotional time is not recommended.
As with divorce, this is a time to spend with friends. It also helps to join a support group of others who have lost a loved one.
2. How long should the mother wait before introducing a new boyfriend to her children?
She should know him at least six months to a year. Otherwise, if she decides after dating him for 4 months that the relationship is going nowhere, the children will inevitably feel another loss. No child should be put through that after going through divorce or death of a parent. Children need time to heal as well. If the new man doesn’t respect that, he’s probably not great boyfriend material.
The first three months of a relationship is the honeymoon period. Everything is fresh and exciting. After around six months, the couple tends to relax and good behavior wears off. A woman gets to see what she’s really dealing with. Before she introduces her new beau to her children, she needs to find out what his goals are, to see if his values and beliefs are consistent with hers, and really develop a friendship with him.
3. What is the best way to introduce a new boyfriend?
Once a woman decides to start dating, she should explain it to each of her children in an age-appropriate manner. After she and a new partner have spent six months to a year together, she can start telling the children things about him, particularly what she likes about him or little stories about places they’ve gone together. This way the children understand that Mom is still Mom, which is critical, but they’ll also see that she’s happier. They will slowly make the adjustment that they may soon share her with somebody else. Inevitably, the children will become curious about him. They may ask to meet him. I think it is wise to slowly incorporate the new partner into the family.
4. How should she handle it if the child resents the new relationship? Should she stop seeing the boyfriend?
Children will often resent a new relationship for the simple reason that they now have to share their mother with someone else. A woman can reassure her children that even though she is going out, she is coming back home to them. She should continue do the things with them she always did. Before she even starts dating, it might help to hire a babysitter and use the afternoon to go shopping, just to get the children accustomed to seeing her go out every once in a while.
Observing the children’s reactions while the new man is around should provide some clues to other causes of resentment. A woman should also gently ask her children why they don’t like her new partner. She should remember, though, that some children may not know exactly how to express why they dislike someone. It’s important to tread carefully. A new relationship is stressful for the whole family.
If the children are really having a hard time with it, family counseling can get to the root of the problem, especially if all other avenues have been exhausted. The most important thing a single parent can do is to treat her children the same way she did before she met the new partner.
5. Is it ever acceptable to allow the boyfriend to sleep over, or should the couple book a babysitter and get a room?
Get a room, unless the kids are at Dad’s for the weekend. Children don’t need to see some stranger coming out of Mom’s room in the morning (or their Dad’s, either). A new relationship is exciting and the partners are certainly entitled to time alone, but a single parent must handle it delicately and deliberately. Her (or his) behavior will instruct the children about man/woman relationships in ways they will carry around with them for the rest of their lives.